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Let me describe her. I believe she is new to the industry because I have never seen her ads before. Calgary is a small city for escorts and I browse all the ads. She is 21, at least that’s what she tells me. She has all the right curves with just a touch of baby fat, and the most beautiful smile. She advertises herself as a Calgary GFE but that means different things to each of us. She allows me to kiss her, deep kissing. She lets me dine at her “Y”, and she licks and sucks my cock bareback (BBBJ). So how did I fall in love? Was it the combination of being inside her and kissing her? Was it the repetition over time of feeling comfortable with her? Was it the long on-going conversations of us sharing each others thoughts, needs, and goals.

I can’t put my finger on only one thing, it just happened. So what now? Does that make me her sugar daddy? Should I stop seeing her knowing that we can never have normal? I know some guys have escorts as girlfriends but I never thought I would be one of them. I haven’t even told her how I felt. I am afraid it may scare her. We have started to entertain ourselves out of the bedroom for dates such as dinner and a movie, or an evening at a Calgary club or bar. I only pay a set fee per week now, not by the hour. Am I being played or did I play myself? How did I let this happen? I fell in love with a Calgary Escort.

I want to take her away from all this. I am the fool. Escorts and love, is it possible? I have put a lot of thought into my situation. I have a couple choices but know if I go on, I can not share her. I have made up my mind. I will see her for six more months, then ask her to be just mine. I will mentally prepare myself to walk away alone with that small ray of hope that she says yes. For now, I enjoy the fantasy I am caught in with my Calgary GFE, my sugar baby.

In Calgary, one out of three relationships are connected to the Internet, from online adult dating, to chat rooms to exchanging emails before you meet. People are connecting online so how do we stay connected after we meet. Relationships are not about getting a small gift, flowers or a box of chocolates, although they are nice, it is recognizing what makes you happy when you are together.

What makes you smile when you think of your partner? What were you doing? Was it a bike ride on a Calgary bike path, a romantic walk by a Calgary night spot, it might have been simply cuddling, feeling warm and safe. If it is an activity, do you both like it? If it was a new activity, ask yourself, did you give it a fair chance? Was there a reason your partner wanted you to try it? Shared activities make strong relationships. If there is something you love a lot, explain it to your partner. Share with them why it is important. Perhaps it is as simple as talking a few moments out of each day and just lying next to each other and talking.

Now for men, yes, giving a small gift to say you are thinking about your partner is always a good gesture. Women on the other hand can spice it up with wearing something sexy underneath. Gifts work too but men are receptive to sexy surprises.  Maybe you want to cook him supper wearing only a few skimpy items or perhaps nothing. Perhaps you want to dine once a week at a favorite Calgary restaurant.

Both partners need to share their needs and wants. Communication is important. Be active and stay connected.

Well they can. Broken hearts mend, they do, just give them a little time. Some relationships involve children. People stay together because of their kid(s). This is a respectful thing to do but at what cost? How do you value your happiness? Depending on the time of year, partners may stay together to get through a holiday. Couples try to get though Christmas or Valentine’s day, because they do not want to be alone. Sometimes it could be as simple as the one partner has a car and the other does not. They rationalize staying together because a car makes life easier – grocery shopping, going to the movies, or to doing laundry. It only delays the inevitable, the day it makes sense to say goodbye. You need to walk away. For most, sooner is better. I have lived in Ottawa for about ten years, and I see my friends fighting with each other, arguing over nothing. Couples that are not meant to be together, to last forever.

Bad relationships start too fast, the new partner is staying overnight, weeks go by, sex is bareback and great, then within weeks, there is that dreaded question, are you moving in? What do you say? If you say yes, there is no turning back. If you say no, then he or she will think you do not like her. Text messages will go unanswered, you start avoiding each other. There is no happy ending.

So what are our chances, divorce rates for first marriages in Canada is only 33 %. The positive side is that means a success rate of 67%. However, this is much lower for people who have been married before. The bottom line is many of us get involved in a relationship too fast, some of us stay in them too long. Let yourself be free.

So now what do we do? Do we stay alone or rebound? Do we allow our friends to hook us up or better yet, do we try online dating? If you do choose online dating, go slow. Have fun without all the strings or commitments that tie people down. Some sites like Facebook-Adult-Dating.com are just that type. Local singles just looking for fun – no strings attached. Chat with them, browse their profiles, ask them questions – get to know them. Online dating makes that easy. When you do find that perfect one, or close to perfect, then let your online dating membership expire and give it a real chance.

With an erotic massage, the therapist makes the room comfortable with scented candles and music. Warm oil is applied to the body in long, sensual strokes, every muscle is touched and pleasured. The man normally is extremely happy at the end and relaxed, ready to go to work or home to his spouse without the feeling of guilt.
Occasionally, one might believe there may be an offer for extras, topless massage, nude massage, reverse (when the man massages the therapist) and perhaps half service. These extras makes the line grey that seperates erotic massage and escorting.

Along with her soft hands, the masseuse  will use her legs, hips, breasts, nipples and buttocks to stimulate her partner’s skin. The happy ending is not rushed, when the masseuse is finished with the man’s back and shoulders, she will ask him to roll over, then caress his front. Then and only when both masseuse and client have bonded, she will fondle his penis from the glans to the base, also fondling his testicles with the other hand. This ultimate release, this catharthsis, will ride waves of pleasure through the man’s entire body. A warm wet cloth is provided to the man, and all is well that ends well.

Women also on occassion call a massage therapist, sometimes they call for a women because they want the intimate feel of their soft hands, and sometimes they call for a man, yearning to be touched by a man, again without the feelings of guilt and regret. 

To compare when a man chooses an escort instead of a erotic massage, who knows what happens behind closed doors. One might assume that there is understanding of sex. With Escorting in the News, independent escorts that work for themselves advertise full service, open minded, GFE which implies a “girlfriend experience.”  GFE implies or promises that the escort will treat you like you were her boyfriend, their is expected a higher level of intimacy and comfort.

When escorts use the term PSE – Porn Star Experience, there is an expectancy of almost wild and taboo sex. It is priced as a premium.  Escorting and Erotic Massage is the world of making fantasy a reality, it is what most people are not getting at home. We want to feel something new, fresh, for the first time agaib - the first kiss with a stranger – the nervousnous of being new again.

There are many decisions and many choices, enjoy whichever is best for you. Let go the feeling of guilt, life is meant to be fun. To help you understand it more, here is a list of tems used by some escorts and clients:

They use terms like
AMP = Asian Massage Parlor
ATM = Ass to Mouth
AWO = anal with condon
Anilingus = kissing and penetration of the anus by tongue
B&S = Bait and Switch, advertise a beauty and send you a ….
Babyback = petite, young and attractive escort(normally an asian)
Bareback = without condon
BBW: big beautiful woman
BDSM = Bondage, Discipline, Sado-Masochism.
Cowgirl – Woman rides on top during intercourse. Facing man.
AC/DC = bisexual
GFE = girlfriend experience
PSE = porn star experience
COB = Cum on Body
COF = Cum on face also known as Face Painting
LFK = light french kissing
CBJ = condon blowjobs
BBBJ = bareback blowjobs
CIM = Cum in Mouth
DATY =Going down on the female, dining at the Y.
DATO = Oral stimulation of the Anus
DDG = Drop Dead Gorgeous
FBSM= Full Body Sensual Massage
69 = Fellatio and cunnilingus. Partners perform oral sex on each other at same time.
Russian = a tit fuck bewteen her breasts
TRIAD = threesome
VFM = Value for money

This list is not exhaustive, there are more but these are the main ones.

In her ruling, Justice Susan Himel said it now falls to Parliament to “fashion corrective action.”

“It is my view that in the meantime these unconstitutional provisions should be of no force and effect, particularly given the seriousness of the charter violations,” Himel wrote.

“However, I also recognize that a consequence of this decision may be that unlicensed brothels may be operated, and in a way that may not be in the public interest.”

The judge suspended the effect of the decision for 30 days. It does not affect provisions dealing with people under 18.

Justice minister Rob Nicholson and Rona Ambrose, minister for the status of women, both said the government is concerned about the decision and “is seriously considering an appeal.”

Dominatrix Terri-Jean Bedford and Valerie Scott and Amy Lebovitch had argued that prohibitions on keeping a common bawdy house, communicating for the purposes of prostitution and living on the avails of the trade force them from the safety of their homes to face violence on the streets.

The women asked the court to declare legal restrictions on their activities a violation of charter rights of security of the person and freedom of expression.

The women and their lawyer, Alan Young, held a news conference Tuesday afternoon and expressed elation.

“It’s like emancipation day for sex-trade workers,” said Bedford, adding the ball is now in Prime Minister Stephen Harper’s court. “The federal government must now take a stand and clarify what is legal and not legal between consenting adults in private.”

Scott called it an amazing victory, saying the decision lessens the risk of violence for sex workers.

“We don’t have to worry about being raped and robbed and murdered,” she said. “This decision means that sex workers can now pick up the phone, and call the police and report a bad client. This means that we no longer have to be afraid, that we can work with the appropriate authorities.”

Moreover, sex workers can set up guilds and associations, health standards, workmen’s compensation programs, as well as pay income tax. “We want to be good citizens and it’s time, now we finally can,” said Scott.

Young handled the case mostly free with the help of 20 of his law students. They were up against nearly a dozen government lawyers.

“Personally, I am overjoyed because this is a great David and Goliath story. Sex-trade workers are disenfranchised and disempowered, and no one has listened to them for 30, 40 years,” Young said.

Ontario AG considers appeal

The case does not solve the problems related to prostitution, he said.

“That’s for your government to take care. Courts just clean up bad laws.”

“So what’s happened is that there’s still going to be many people on the streets and many survival sex workers who are motivated by drugs and sometimes exploited by very bad men. That’s not going to change,” Young added.

“Here’s what changed. Women who have the ability, the wherewithal and the resources and the good judgment to know that moving indoors will protect them now have that legal option. They do not have to weigh their safety versus compliance with the law.”

A spokesman for Ontario’s attorney general said the office will be reviewing the decision carefully and will consult federal colleagues regarding a potential appeal.

“Ontario intervened and argued that the prostitution provisions of the Criminal Code are constitutional and valid and designed to prevent individuals, and particularly young people, from being drawn into prostitution, to protect our communities from the negative impacts of street prostitution and to ensure that those who control, coerce or abuse prostitutes are held accountable for their actions,” said the statement from the Ontario attorney general’s office.

The government had argued that striking down the provisions without enacting something else in their place would “pose a danger to the public.”

‘Shocking and horrific’

Some conservative groups such as Real Women of Canada, which had intervener status in the case, argued that decriminalizing prostitution may make Canada a haven for human trafficking and that prostitution is harmful to the women involved in it.

While prostitution is technically legal, virtually every activity associated with it is not. The Criminal Code prohibits communication for the purpose of prostitution. It also prohibits keeping a common bawdy house for the purpose of prostitution.

Those laws enacted in 1985 were an attempt to deal with the public nuisance created by streetwalkers. They failed to recognize the alternative — allowing women to work more safely indoors — was prohibited.

The ban on bawdy houses is an indictable offence that carries stiffer sanctions, including jail time and potential forfeiture of a woman’s home, while the ban on communication for prostitution purposes is usually a summary offence that at most leads to fines.

The provisions prevent sex-trade workers from properly screening clients, hiring security or working in the comfort and safety of their own homes or brothels, Young said.

Young cited statistics behind the “shocking and horrific” stories of women who work the streets, along with research that was not available when the Supreme Court of Canada upheld the communication ban in 1990.

With files from The Canadian Press

DOCUMENT: Ruling in Bedford vs. Canada